No Urinals in Iran
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I was greeted by smiles. When I explained where I was from, the smiles got bigger. Hooking fingers seemed to be human nature—we can be friends and can get along. | Cars merge through major intersections without traffic lights as if that’s the norm. And, surprisingly…it works. |
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10,000 rials is worth a dollar. While Washington made it on our one dollar bill, Khomeini made it on every denomination here. | Women are covered yet beautiful. In a land where there is no cleavage, a wisp of hair can be ravishing. |
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Locals find me quite interesting. Routinely I’ve looked up from my note-taking and seen people gathered, curious, and wanting to talk. |
After a few days in Iran, I can’t help but think how tourism could boom here if they just opened it up. There are a few Western tourists (Germans, French, Brits, Dutch) but they all seem to be either on a tour, with a private guide, or visiting relatives. Control gets tighter and looser depending on the political climate, but basically American tourists can visit only with a guided tour. I meet no one just exploring on their own.
Tourists are so rare and sights are so few and obvious that you bump into the same people day after day. Browsing through picture books and calendars showing the same 15 or 20 images of the top sights in Iran, I’m impressed by how we've managed to see, or are scheduled to see, most of them. The Lonely Planet guidebook dominates – it seems every Westerner here has one. It’s good.
Our guide makes sure we’re eating in comfortable (i.e. high-end) restaurants (generally in hotels). They say tap water is no problem, but I’m sticking with the bottled kind. I wasn’t wild about the food on my first trip. It’s much better now...but still ranks about with Norwegian cuisine in terms of excitement value.
Driving is hair-raising. For several days now we’ve been zipped smoothly around by Majid, our driver. To illustrate how clueless I am here, for three days I’ve been calling him "Najaf." And whenever a bit of filming goes well and we triumphantly return to the car, I give him an enthusiastic thumbs up. Finally today he and our guide explained that I’ve been confusing his name with a city in Iraq...and that giving someone a thumbs up in Iran is like giving them the finger.
Majid drives our eight-seater bus like a motor scooter, weaving in and out of traffic that flows down the street and between lanes like rocks in an avalanche. At major intersections there are no lights – everyone just shuffles through. It works differently here than it would at home – people are great drivers here, and, somehow, it works. I think I’ll actually drive more aggressively when I get home. Adding to the chaotic traffic mix are the pedestrians, doing their best to navigate a wild landscape. Locals say when you set out to cross a big street, “you go to Chechnya.” I’m told that Iran loses 30,000 people on the roads (in cars and on foot) a year.
The money is complicated. There are about 10,000 rial in a dollar. (If you exchange $100 dollars you are literally a millionaire here.) Ten rial is called a tuman, and some prices are listed in rial, others in tuman...a tourist rip-off just waiting to happen. (I had a shirt laundered at the hotel for "20,000." Was that in rial, i.e. $2? Or was the list in tuman, which would mean the service cost $20? It was hard to tell.) There are no coins and no state-issued large bills. Local banks print large bills to help local commerce. To tell a counterfeit, you rub the number with your finger – if it's the real deal, the warmth makes the numbers disappear just momentarily.
Women are required to cover their hair with a scarf. Local women are expert at wearing them to show just enough hair to grab the eye. In a land where showing cleavage is essentially against the law, a tuft of hair above the forehead becomes the exciting place a man’s eye tends to seek out. Tourist women are also required to wear scarves. After appreciating the art of local women being provocative with their hair and scarves, the tourists' efforts seem quite clumsy.
There are no urinals anywhere. I did an extensive search: at the airport, fancy hotels, the university, the fanciest coffee shops. No urinals in Iran. I was told that Muslims believe you don't get rid of all your urine when you urinate standing up. For religious reasons, they squat.
Neckties are rarely seen, as they're considered the mark of a Shah supporter.
Restaurants use Kleenex rather than napkins; there’s a box of Kleenex on every dining table. There is absolutely no booze or beer in public. While I keep ordering a yogurt drink (similar to Turkish ayran), our guide and driver enjoyed “malt beverages” – non-alcoholic beer that comes in beer bottles or cans.
Many times, while I’ve been sitting in the shade quietly reading or writing while the crew got the shots they needed, people have come up to me and curiously asked where I'm from and what we're doing. I chatted with one young man who didn’t look as if he was particularly in compliance with the revolution. After we said goodbye, he thought about our conversation, returned and said, “One present from you to me please. You must read Koran. Is good. No politics.” The Islamic Revolutionist government has been in power for 30 years now; this man's generation knows nothing else. But then, why should an evangelical Muslim be any more surprising/menacing/annoying than an evangelical Christian?
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You are reading "No Urinals in Iran", an entry posted on 21 May 2008 by Rick Steves.
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