Most Embarrassing Travel Moments
Part of the fun of travel is the ridiculous spots we find ourselves in due to a language barrier, cultural misunderstanding, or just bad luck. Do you dare to share your most embarrassing European travel moment?
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The Naked and the 'Dead'
Ruffin, Wales dateline, May 1999.
Early morning, as a cold, faint drizzle fell, a man and his wife broke into their own hotel. Returning late from the famous "Medieval Feast" held at a castle 2 kilometers away, the not so indigent couple found themselves locked out of their 400 year old hotel on the wrong side of the giant solid oak door that prevented their more sedate entrance and access to their room and belongings. This front door absorbed like a vacuum their pitiable banging's and yelling's and all other sounds they made.
Shivering, the wife pleaded with her husband to save her from the cold and drizzle. Being intrepid (and brave good-looking too), he circled the ancient structure to find a weak point to gain entry. Finally, he spied a wrought iron fire escape ladder almost as old as the hotel. Grasping the most available rung (for some reason, the ladder ended on the ground behind a high hedge), he pulled himself up and over the hedge and onto the ladder, fearing its collapse at any moment.
When it held his considerable weight, he climbed up to the next landing. Finding no entrance, he glanced up to notice a door leading from the attic on the fourth floor. But to get to it, he had to shimmy along the side of the hotel on the rain gutter ledge to the next part of the fire escape ladder. This part of the ladder made the earlier part look as solid as the U.S. dollar (hmmm). Climbing up the funhouse ladder and wondering when, not if, it would collapse under him, the brave (and still good-looking) husband achieved the highest point only to find the little access door locked solid. Only then did he see another door below him on the third level. Going back down, he tried this door and YES!!!! It was open to someone's bathroom and it clearly belonged to some other guests of the hotel.
The husband and wife agreed this was the only way in. So as the wife duplicated the climb up to the third floor landing,(SHE can tell how she managed that) the husband entered the door and announced his presence. As expected, the room's occupant was a bit startled by an intruder and so confronted the strange man in his bathroom. It would have been less dramatic had he bothered putting on any type of clothes whatsoever first. Needless to say, the husband's explanation as to why he was there was not as clear as intended, but once understood, the room's occupant agreed to allow passage, but needed to warn his wife. That would be prudent, the husband agreed.
And so, the husband and wife managed to break into their own hotel, though the wife could not stop apologizing and nagging at the husband to "Get the damned door open!" to the hallway faster. Those old door locks you have to line up the key juuuuust right you know. The husband just remembers the startled eyes of the wife of the room's occupant peering at him from under the sheets. wide and accusingly.
Yes, the room's occupant put on some pants.
John <email>
Sacramento, California USA 11/04/2009
Do the Texas Shuffle
While I was studying abroad in Finland, I was invited to join my local "family" and their friends for a weekend trip to a ski resort type of place. Even though I'm from Texas and therefore had never gone skiing in my life, I said OK, because I'm always open to new experiences, especially when I'm somewhere else.
All the people in our group kind of decided to do their own thing, and since I didn't want to pay the expensive rental fee for skis, I borrowed some cross-country skis from one of the men in the group (who happened to have small feet). Then I was pretty much on my own on a cross-country trail while the Finns sped ahead of me (after I insisted that they go on ahead).
I was pretty terrible at it, and after about 20 minutes of grueling upper-body work, falling, and doing some crazy Cirque du Soleil contortion moves to stand back up, I decided to just turn around and go back the other way to check out the other side of the trail. There was a gravel driveway leading up to the downhill skiing area that I had to cross to get back to the snow on the other side. It was pretty pathetic; all I could really do was scoot along the rough gravel with these big awkward skis on my feet, and on top of that I was trying to use the sticks (not even sure what they're called) to pull myself along. Of course I was too much of an idiot to just take the skis OFF and WALK across!
The really embarrassing part of this whole ordeal is that at least four or five Finns were coming up on the driveway either in cars or on snowmobiles, and here I am shuffling along and looking like a jackass!
They waited patiently, as most polite Finns will do, but I did get some weird looks from a couple of them, probably because I look just like a Finn (many people assumed I was Finnish while I was there), and it's very odd to see a Finn sucking so bad on skis. I wanted to yell "I'm from Texas! We don't do this kind of thing over there!", but all I could do was give a stupid smile as I struggled across the driveway that seemed like a mile wide!
Sarah <email>
Dallas, TX USA 09/27/2009
End of the Line
I was in Stuttgart and was heading from Vaihingen to the Flughafen on the S-bahn. I knew that either the S2 or S3 line should take me there, so when the first appropriate train showed up I climbed on and sat down. I failed to notice that that particular train did not go on to the Flughafen, but ended in Vaihingen and was in fact going out of service. Instead of heading down the main line, the train slowly moved onto a side track, stopped, and the lights went out. As I sat there in the dark I realized I had made a mistake, so I got up and started toward the front of the car. I was soon face to face with an irate Bahn employee who roundly cursed me out for not getting off his train. As I stammered my apology -- "Es tut mir leid" -- he retorted angrily, "Yah, mir auch!"
Matt A.
Ortonville, MI USA 09/24/2009
Americans and Geography
I suppose based on other things I've seen, I could've done worse. But I was in Norway and a bunch of people were trying to convince me to come to Bergen. Without thinking I blurted out "Are there mountains in Bergen?", and they were all kind about answering "yes." The next day I was a little more awake, broke down the word and realized that may be the dumbest question I've ever asked.
Then again I returned from that trip to go to a friend's party in Chicago where I met a boy who I talked to about traveling. He was intrigued that I'd been to Amsterdam and told me he'd always wanted to go there. He said, "Amsterdam, man, ain't dat like somewhere in London yo?" I suddenly felt better about my Bergen question.
Me
Chicago, IL USA 09/20/2009
Late night handyman
My wife and I we're traveling England. Normally we stay in rooms that have a private bathrom/toilet. We checked into a small hotel in Clovelly England and the only rooms left shared bathrooms. OK for a single night. As I need to use the public toilet at 2:00 am, I feel fairly assured I am the only one needing to pee at that time of night. I do my thing but the toilet does not flush. Rather than ignoring the situation, I pride myself on being a fairly resourful handyman. So I stand on the toilet to reach into the water tank above the toilet trying to feel or fix something. As I am standing on the toilet a young woman walks in and sees me reaching high above with my hands in the water tank. We we're both startled, and she scampers off...I had no time to explain. Lessons learned, while traveling always lock the bathroom door in a shared rest room and leave the fixer up projects alone.
mike
Indianapolis, IN USA 07/25/2009
I have so many....
For months prior to going to Italy, I had faithfully tried to learn some Italian. My more linguistically inclined wife had insisted I try some phrases out at restaurants and hotels. I was intrepid, so in Verona, after a long day, I asked for a room with a shower, then wanted to know if they took credit cards, so I asked, "accepto carta igienica?". Both my wife and the proprietor looked at me, then busted out laughing. In perfect Italian, I had instead asked if he accepts tiolet paper. I really, really wish this was not a true story.
As an afternote, I think he is still waiting for good ole American 2-ply in payment. We were never charged for the room.
John <email>
Sacramento, California USA 07/23/2009
Photo Faux Pas
Years ago on a tour I visited the Island of Corfu in Greece. One afternoon I decided to do my own thing; hike around the island and take some shots with my new 35mm camera. I was enjoying myself hiking along a path and shooting the awesome scenery. When suddenly the path came to an end at a private local beach. It was stunning. I put my eye up to the view finder to get a picture. It wasn't until I focused the lens that I realized I was standing on a nude beach. I was so embarrassed, as many of the sun bathers had turned to stare at the photographer that had interrupted their privacy. I can't imagine what they thought (well, actually I can.) Needless to say I couldn't get out of there fast enough.
Michelle
Fullerton, CA USA 06/18/2009
Common language indeed
In response to Tami's comments,"You alright?" in a shop does mean "can I help you?" Commonly "Y'alright?" is also an informal greeting between friends when they first meet. I think it sounds as strange to American ears, as when Americans great me with "What's up?" which is only used in the UK if people think something is the matter!
Andy Thompson <email>
London , UK 06/12/2009
Do you speak Indian?
This story didn't actually happen on a trip but rather, inspired a trip because it happened. I was at a wedding with some coworkers many years ago and one of them, an ex-coworker had just returned from another long trip through India. As somewhat of an India expert, he had been there many times for extended periods. At the time I was not very well traveled and also slightly inebriated. I asked him how his trip went and wondering how he got by with the language barrier being a native English speaker I asked, "...so uh, how did you communicate, do you speak Indian?". Even before I finished asking the question I knew how ridiculously stupid that sounded. Of course, I later learned that the name of the language is Hindi but that English is also the second official language and commonly spoken by locals.
This incident bothered me for a while and made me realize just how ignorant I was about the world around me. I took my first trip to Europe later that year and two years after that I took my first trip to India, almost in the spirit of making amends for my embarrassing lack of knowledge two years prior.
Since that time I have made an effort to travel every year, trying to experience as much as I can. It has been a fantastic ride.
KC
San Leandro, CA USA 06/09/2009
Railpass Stupidity
On our first trip to Europe we carelessly left our railpass covers at home after my friend suggested they would be too bulky in our moneybelts. To our suprise when attempting to validate we were turned away and stuck in Brussels. By some miracle my sister pulled a crumpled ball from her pack and asked the man, "Is this it?". After a lot of pleading he validated all three passes just to get us out of there. A prayer that we would not be kicked off, came with every train ride for the rest of the 3 week trip, but every ticket taker just gave us a strange look when presented with three passes inside one sad looking cover.
Amy
White Plains, NY USA 06/07/2009
The bus
While we were on a bus in florence, two men, standing over my friend Emma, offered her the handle bar on the bus. I did not know that they were talking to her at the time, so i said "No parlo Italiano" which meant, i do not. speak Italian. The two men just laughed and patted me on the back....
Heather Ray
Boise, Idaho USA 06/03/2009
How much?!?
It was my groups first night in Italy, and we were looking for dinner. We found this small snack bar in an street where only Smart cars and scooters could go. Any way I bought a Ham and Cheese sandwich with a coke and some Gelato. It cost me 10 euros total. The only money I had was 5, 20, and 50 euros. I payed with my 20. The Italian man at the counter was not the best at English, and I was not that good at Italian, and he said, "You give me 10 euro and I give you ten euro." I said yes not exactly sure what he said. He asked me again so I dug out some more money. He did not want it. He said "I you give my ten euro." I said "Yes, I need ten euros in change!" The man gave me a mean face and I walked away. Everyone else in line looked at me like I was stupid. I it was sooooooooo embarrassing!!!
Elizabeth
Boise, Idaho USA 06/03/2009
Ah, Amore!
While traveling through Italy by train, we often met friendly travelers with whom we tried to communicate in some Italian on our part and broken English on theirs. The phrase book often came in handy. I was looking up the phrase for "We are on our honeymoon" while my husband chatted with some seat mates. I quietly repeated the words over and over again. It wasn't until I heard giggling that I realized that I mixed up the correct phrase with the one above it the phrase book. What I was repeating was "We are horny!" If I could have crawled under the seat, I would have!!
Andrea
Fall River, MA USA 05/25/2009
embarassing order in restaurant
Our first day of the Rick Steves trip was in St. Goar in the gorgeous, rugged Rhine valley. Several times during the day I'd seen the sign, "Durchgehende warme kuche" in front of restaurants, and assumed it must be some kind of local specialty cake!
After getting back to the hotel we ventured out in the early evening to find something to eat. She wanted to buy something to go and eat down by the river, I wanted to find that cake specialty I'd wanted to try, so we compromised by getting gyros (called by the Turkish name Doner Kebap) to eat down by the river, then looking for a cafe. The "Durgehende warme kuche" signs seemed to have disappeared, except for the same cafe that we had eaten in the night before. . We walked in and I asked, "Durchgehende warme kuche?"
The tall slender Romanian waitress paused a moment, and then said, "...Yes". So we found a table at the back of the deck which wound around the restaurant, where we could still see the Romantic Rhine, but away from the traffic noise. The two tables between us and the river seemed to be occupied by honeymooning couples.
The waitress came and we ordered "ein Kannchen Kafee" (a small pot of coffee) and she asked us if we wanted to come see the cakes.
"No, I don't need to see them," I said emphatically, "Because I know just what I want, I've been waiting to try the 'durchgehende warme kuche' and I don't want anything else."
"Well...you can't have that," she said with a straight face,"because it means 'kitchen open all the time' ". We both just cracked up laughing, and we ordered apfel strudel.
When we were ready to go, I asked Nancy to go pay as I was afraid I would "lose it" agian if I looked that waitress in the face. Nancy came back and said that the waitress said that she'd never forget us!
(I had ignored the "umlaut", and had thus confused the word "kitchen" with the word for "cake"----the signs had disappeared because it was a Sunday evening and the places were no longer serving hot food!)
Grace Clark <email>
Phoienix, AZ USA 05/04/2009
Dinner and a Show
Recently in Florence I was in the mood for Bistecca Fiorentina. I was seated in a crowded room of people. As a solo diner I chose the seat that faced most of the dining room to enjoy the conviviality of the place, people watch, as well as see the foods ordered by others.
I had eaten 3/4 of this delicious steak and while slicing my next bite, my knife somehow slipped and slammed the plate hard...and loud. Loud enough to stop all conversation and turn the head of every diner present. The waiter turned, saw I was OK and just gave me the greatest smile and and handshake. I took a seated bow and everyone in the room enjoyed the moment.
Cheryl <email>
Pittsburgh, PA USA 02/21/2009
Separated by a common language
On my first day on my first trip to London, everyone kept asking me if I was "alright". The guy at the Oyster card window asked "Are you alright?" after I bought my card. The lady at the newstand asked "you alright?", the lady at Boots. All kept asking "are you alright?" I assured them I was just fine thanks, just a bit tired.. So the next day at HMV while looking through CDs, the sales lady came up and asked "are you alright?" so I asked her if I looked pale or ill, maybe because i am jetlagged and tired I looked bad or sick, etc.. She laughed and said "no, I was just asking if youre alright, you know, if you needed help finding something". So apparently, asking "Are you alright?" in the UK = "Can I help you"?
Tami <email>
Boulder , CO USA 02/17/2009
Too Piccolo
I entered a lingerie shop in Milan to purchase a bra that was advertised on a poster in the window. My Italian was very poor and the elderly shop clerk's English was non-existent. So, I pointed to the poster, pointed to my chest, and attempted to say "for me--34A." The shop clerk smiled and nodded but did nothing, so I repeated the gesture and said slowly a few more times "34A. . . A. . . A." The shop clerk again smiled and nodded, went into the back of the store and returned with a large box. I opened a box to discover the largest brassiere I had ever seen. Seriously, I could have placed one of the cups on my head and worn it as a cap! So, I started laughing and said, "no, no, no--A, A" again pointing to my chest. I saw a piece of paper and pencil near the register, so I wrote "34A" and underscored the "A." With that, the shop clerk announced very loudly "too piccolo, too piccolo" and quickly ushered me out the front door. When I told my husband what happened, he proceeded to laugh hysterically as he explained to me to that my breasts were much "too small" for the shop owner to be of assistance.
Kathryn <email>
Dallas, TX USA 02/14/2009
Who is Van Gogh
On a recent trip to Amsterdam, my friend and I decided to walk from our hotel to the Dam Square so we can see more, take pictures and spend time at the sights. On the way was the Van Gogh museum where people were waiting in line for the doors to open. We stood there waiting and after a couple of minutes, my friend opened his mouth and said in a very loud voice "who is this Van Gogh, he is not popular, what has he done, i dont like him, lets go". I felt everyone was looking at us and I would like to melt and disappear. I stared at him for a full minute, then said out loud to the crowd that I have never met this person in my entire life, then left heading towards the opposite direction. I have never been so humiliated like that in my entire life.
Cocoy
USA 01/12/2009
Sharing a bed with my adult son
Went on a shopping trip to Dublin with my 25 year old son, and when we arrived at our place of overnight accomodation only to discover that we had been booked in as a married couple and that we would have to share the same room and bed for the night. The Inn had no alternative rooms or spare beds so we literally had no choice but to spend a night in bed together.
Barbara
London, UK 01/10/2009